Life's Journey

This has been a long week… wait! What? It's only Wednesday!?!?! Phew, I'm exhausted already. Turns out there's a reason for that…

I wasn’t able to get chemo this week because of my lab results. The first step on chemo days is blood work to make sure everything is ok for treatment. I went in Tuesday prepared for chemo with friend in tow but, the lab results were not good enough. Turns out skipping a week of Neupogen (aka bone pain shots) causes my immune system to drop. My levels were lower than ever. I was sent straight in for a shot and told to go home to "the bubble". I will get the shots four days this week - lucky me I earned an extra shot. Sigh. Four shots = lots of pain. I'm taking things to try to help it and I'm armed with pain meds but usually I just have to deal with it.

Living in "the bubble" is boring. Ok, ok, it's not really a bubble, it's just me sitting in the house by myself. Because my immune system sucks it would be super easy for me to pick up a little virus that quickly turns to something nasty. "The bubble" keeps me away from all that… because I never leave the house (except to get my shots of course). No grocery, no restaurants, no malls, no movies, no gas stations… just the house. Just me and my germ-free bubble.

Zzzz… oh sorry I think I fell asleep there for a second  I'm so tired... The lab results also showed that my red blood cell counts are going back down. We would be talking blood transfusion again but we can't until we build back up my immune system.  These low levels make me tired, really tired. Zzzz…

My goal is to make the best of it this week. I can focus on work and get a lot done. I am doing some spring cleaning - pulling everything out of closets and drawers and getting rid of the crap. It's amazing how much crap you collect over time. I'm also pulling out my art supplies… it's time to paint again. So… up yours cancer! I'm going to find the silver lining and make the best of whatever you send my way. I'm not wasting my time moping and complaining… I'd rather laugh and smile and keep trying to kick your ass! But… um… first I'm going to take a nap

Sending hugs & smiles,
Sarah